Love Advice: How To Distinguish True Love From In-Betweens Feelings

Kimmy Karima |Aug 08, 2019

There are many feelings similar to true love. So similar that you may mistake them as the love of your life. Here we’ll tell you the ways to distinguish between them.

Sometimes you’re unsure about your feelings for someone. You don’t know if you genuinely love them, or it’s just something else.

It may be neither romance nor pure friendship. More precisely, not a platonic relationship, not yet real love. It may be something like lust or crush, affection, or attraction. That’s why we call those feelings “in-betweens.”

Is It Love
“What's this feeling?” is such a common question.

If you want to be sure before any further commitment, let’s look at the differences to know if what you’re having is real love or just a phase of infatuation.

The way you think about yourself around him/her

Comfortable
True lovers don’t put too much weight on each other’s appearance.

If it’s true love, you don’t worry much about your look when you’re around them. Because you know they care about you for who you are, not for how you look. You’re entirely comfortable and confident about yourself because they make you feel that way.

On the other hand, if you’re anxious about your appearance every time you think of meeting them, then it’s a red flag. Similarly, if you try very hard to look gorgeous before every date just because you fear that your partner thinks you’re not good looking enough, that’s, unfortunately, far from love!

The way you see their imperfections

Flaws
True lovers embrace each other’s flaws.

When you love someone, you accept his/her whole self, with flaws and all. You know that no one is perfect, and there’s beauty in the imperfection. So, you’re even in love with their weaknesses and gently nudge them to get better.

If you’re having infatuation or so, you don’t see any imperfections. You see the good sides and how they make you happy. About their bad sides, you shrug off altogether.

The way you communicate with them

Conversation
Communication is essential in love. Photo: Shutterstock.

Deep love always involves in-depth talks. That’s because both sides would like to find out more about each other. Each wants to know every little thing about the other. You may also want to meet the other’s family and friends because you want to share their life.

If every date involves sex, or every talk leads to that theme (and nothing more), you should be careful. It’s rather just lust or infatuation, or worse, it’s just the sexual desire getting out of control. Once the sexual attraction fades, the feelings will too.

Besides, if you or your partner doesn’t seem to like meaningful conversations, you should take this as a “NOT LOVE” sign also.

The way you express what you feel

Express
Your real lover will be supportive when you express your feelings.

In true love, you don’t have to think twice before expressing your feelings. You aren’t afraid of being judged or criticized just because you feel this way or that way. It’s just so reassuring!

Contrarily, if you hesitate to show your feelings to the other one for fear of being judged or being rejected, you can’t call it love. What kind of relationship is it, if we can’t honestly open up to each other?

In short, take your time before deciding that the feeling you’re having is true love or not. Don’t rush, but don’t dismiss your feelings altogether either. Just be patient and spend more time with him/her, true romance may come later on.

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