Dating Guru: 3 Types Of Toxic Relationships To Avoid And Signs To Recognize Them
Kanchana Ngan |May 04, 2019
A toxic relationship can be dangerous and exhausting, leaving the couple in great pain. So it's necessary to identify them and get away as soon as possible.
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There's a thing called toxic relationship in which people have to suffer from anxiety, furiousness, exhaustion, as well as many other problems. Maintaining this kind of dating, in most cases, cannot be a success, and breaking up seems to be inevitable. So what is the point to have it prolonged?
Aware of the matter's seriousness, you may wonder if your relationship is healthy or not. Here we provide signs to recognize the three most common toxic ones, in which every behavior should pay attention.
1. A dishonest relationship
- Lies: You can't ask for his/her honesty, understanding or respect, because there are no such things for a liar.
- Lots of secrets: Everybody can have his/her privacy and keep them secret. However, in a close relationship, serious secrets such as meeting another person quickly lead to big problems.
- Pleading for truth: Have you ever required your partner to "promise" their honesty? Or things they share with you are right, but not lies only? If you have to plead for the truth continually, it's the sign of trust reduction between you two.
- Defensiveness: Defensiveness is considered a natural reaction of the body to protect ourselves whenever danger or threat are sensed. Once you've experienced so much dishonesty, your body may produce this feeling for self-protection.
2. An emotionless relationship
- Unavailability of emotions: It's from common sense that a relationship needs to be mutual, which means both sides are asked to show their interest and care. As a result, should emotions come from just one partner, the other will feel left out, distanced and rejected.
- Dismissive behavior: It can be seen as an unavoidable consequence of the lack of intimacy, leaving two people involved unconcerned about each other.
- Lack of concern: As said above, to this point, no one's willing to pay any investment in the relationship anymore, both materialistically or emotionally.
- Disconnection: This can be considered the worst scenario caused by emotionlessness. It happens when the partners are too disinterested or tired of each other to keep staying side by side. Consequently, breaking up is simply up your front.
3. An abusive relationship
- Manipulation: While occasional arguments usually help the couple understand each other more, or add some spices for life, in toxic relationships, it's changed. Instead, there appear the abuser and abusee who treat each other with aggressiveness, hostility, and manipulation.
- Threats: According to scientific researches, threats exist not only in the form of physical abuse, but also mental, verbal and psychological harassment.
- Violence: If the other regularly commit violence towards you, maybe you're put in an abusive relationship. What's worse about the situation is that sometimes those acts are taken without the abuser's consciousness, due to being drunk for example. And after that, the person will give apologies or pleading you not to leave.
- Possessiveness: Possessiveness, in many cases, is the major root for the acts of abuse. Saying that he/she care about you, the abuser will control your every movement in life by calling continuously, checking your phones or even not allowing you to hang out with friends.
Are these toxic relationships repairable?
Although in most cases, it's tough to turn these toxic relationships into positive ones, especially when you two are spouses already, bonding with each other in many aspects like houses, finances, babies, etc. However, there's still hope to repair a broken dating.
Remember that accountability, understanding, and commitment are key factors that determine the outcome of your relationship. Don't hesitate to sit down and have an open talk from the bottom of the heart with your partner. Truthfulness has never failed to lead you to success, or at least the biggest satisfaction. In case you two can't deal by yourself, meeting counselors or experts is not a bad idea.
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