I Can't Get An Erection After My Wife Left For Another Man 2 Years Ago. What Should I Do?

Salena Harshini |Jun 12, 2020

I couldn't understand why this is happening to me when I have tried to be a good man with both ex-wife and girlfriend now. I can't get an erection in bed as I was obsessed with the past and everyone in the village knew my history. Please help!

I can't get an erection cuz everyone knows my wife dumped me

Two years ago, my ex-wife left me to be with the man she met at her high school reunion. Both of them are 32 years old now while I am 35. When I and she got divorced, everyone around the neighborhood was gossiping about it for months, even my two kids were questioned a lot at their school.

The divorce broke me. I was obsessed with what people said behind my back. I had a hard time dealing with it while my kids also had to move between my house and my ex-wife's houses all the time. She has now settled down with the guy she cheated on me with.

Well, actually I have met someone else for a few months now. She is beautiful, passionate, and considerate. She also loves my children and sympathizes with my past.

My wife cheated on me, dumped me and now I can't have sex

But the thing is I find out that I am not good at the intimate things like I was before. I am not saying I was a pro in the past, but at least I was better than now.

I cannot get an erection. Even when I can, it does not last for enough time. I have done everything I can to get the guy up and my girlfriend also tries to help, but it does not work.

Although she says it does not matter, it still troubles me a lot. I want to show her I can be a great lover and give her a good time. If this state does not stop soon, I’m afraid I will lose her.

What can I do about this? What do you think is the reason for my case? Thank you so much.

What is the advice?

We appreciate that you have reached for help, and we hope these will help you in some way.

Your erection problems may directly result from a physical cause. Below are a number of probable reasons why you can’t make your body work the way you want:

  • Drinking too much or using excessive recreational drugs
  • Being exhausted
  • Smoking
  • Being overweight and not exercising
  • Being under stress
  • Being affected by side effects of prescription medication (specifically, anti-depressants often affect the erection; so you should ask for a substitute)
  • Having a medical condition like high blood pressure or diabetes

You can check if you are under any of those cases. If you do, cut down on it and see if there is any improvement.

Indian Couple
Do not let the past and pressure haunt you

Also, you have probably heard about “performance anxiety”. This term refers to men who get so anxious about not doing well in bed that they fail to erect. It leads to a confidence crisis and can be cured by an understanding partner.

In this case, you have already had a sympathetic partner who loves and understands you. I know the split broke your heart and maybe affected your confidence, but do not let it ruin your present and future.

Without worries about intercourse, take sex backs to basics. You should focus on kissing, caressing, massage, and pleasuring one another. Then, you will surely find the erections springing back.

>>> Editor's pick for you: Exercise To Last Longer In Bed | Easiest And Quick Tips To Improve Sexual Performance For India Men

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