7 Ways To Prepare For Your Meeting With The In-laws

Ariana Linh |Aug 28, 2019

Few ever think of meeting his partner's parents early on in the relationship. However, once the love progresses, that's when families become involved. if you are willing to commit, you'll have to face them sooner or later, so be prepared.

Have you ever thought about seeing your partner's family? Normally at the first stages of a relationship, few ever think of meeting his significant other's parents. However, once the love progresses, that's when families become involved. if you are willing to commit, you'll have to face them sooner or later, and it's always better to be prepared.

Inlaw 1
Sooner or later, you'll meet the in-laws. Source: Bridebox.com

7 Ways To Prepare For Your Meeting With The In-laws

According to a study on couples of 16-years-or-more of marriage, women had a higher chance of getting divorced with their significant other if they developed a sense of familiarity with their in-laws too early into the relationship. On the other hand, men showed an opposite trend, meaning they are less likely to split if they are close with their in-laws.

This finding establishes one important thing: it's better for man to initiate talks with her parents. To be more accurate, we have inquired the help of experts and therapist to give you some tips to impress them the first time you meet.

1. Talk with your partner first

Inllaw Talk
Talk about her parents before you meet them. Source: Shutterstock.com

When interviewed, most experts believe you should always have a chat with your partner beforehand. Ask her how if she shares an intimate bond with her parents, compare said information with your own family, and establish boundaries as necessary. As Sarah Epstein, a marriage and family therapist based in Philadelphia, said: different families have a different approach in how involved they are in their children's lives.

2. Be straight-forward on the tough questions

Inlaw Indian
Your partner and her parents might come from a different culture. Source: Thehansindia.com

Dr Jess O’Reilly, a sexologist, advised that people come from a range of culture, and having cultural sensitivity is very important if you want to meet her family. Dr O’Reilly suggests you resolve these background distinction immediately, to make sure you don't tread unto unwanted territories. The sexologist also said it's better to go through these questions before any conflict occur so you and your partners can tackle them with a clear head.

3. Learn their style

Inlaw Talk
Really get to know them and overcome your differences. Source: Shutterstock.com

Family and marriage therapist Abigail Thompson gives us another insight into dealing with in-laws. She said even when things go well with your partner on a day-to-day basis, doesn't mean this will hold true to your partner's parents. Learn from your sweetheart, read the atmosphere and act accordingly and you'll be just fine.

4. Meet them (but make it short)

Inlaw Short
A short meal can really go a long way in getting to know the in-laws. Source: Boldsky.com

Author Kevin Darne specialized in relationship columns, advised you to arrange meetings with your in-laws early on. But one thing Darne stressed, is to keep these meetings short, at about an hour or 2 in length. Don't overstay your welcome, and leave them wanting more.

5. Be yourself

Inlaw You
Be respectable, be polite, but don't forget to be yourself. Source: Sohedid.com

Your partner is with you because of who you are. So, show this side to his family. As a clinical psychologist, Jeff Nalin said: Get his parents to know what makes you unique, but the key is still maintaining a level of politeness and respect towards his father and mother.

6. Remember the boundaries we talked about in step 1? Establish them!

Boundaries are important to set up if you want to be on good terms with her parents. Source: Sheknows.com

Rules and boundaries are sometimes huge turnoffs in a new relationship. However, in more mature scenarios, they are definitely detrimental. You have already had this talk with your partner, now, you have to talk with her parents about the same things. Although this can prove to be a very difficult task, as there are no easy openings, you have to set the boundaries straight of what you and they are willing to talk about.

7. Don't let them intervene too much

You have your own family now. Her parents come later. Source: Eviemagazine.com

This tip is more of a supplementary to the last one. There are many who parted ways with their parents early on since this is normally for Western countries. However, there are still many, especially with Asians families and even some westerns, who are far from independent from their parents.

Marriage, or just moving out with each other, might be the first sign of independence your partner has ever had from her parents. The aforementioned boundaries would hopefully set up how much her parents can have a say in your relationship.


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